Tuesday, January 12, 2010

Among the Living, Huzzah!

Today marks 12 weeks preggo!! It's hard to believe that I made the news public two weeks ago already!

Well, you know from my last post that I've struggled in a big way with all-day "morning" sickness. The good news is that I'm feeling signs of life again! Last Wednesday, after six full weeks of being on the couch, I felt a welcome wave of goodness in my belly and a generous helping of energy. (Well, generous in proportion to what had become the norm). Since that day, I have gotten out of the house at least once every day. I've been able to go out to a dinner date with Clark, go to Target to explore the new-to-me baby department, go on a spur-of-the-moment double date with our friends Matt and Layna, and I made it to church for the first time in five weeks. In my normal life, I would have a weekly lunch date with my friend Abbi (an old co-worker) and a weekly spiritual accountability hangout time with Layna - both of which I've been able to do since feeling better. I was even able to go to a church leadership meeting on Saturday, though I do have to admit that the 9:00 am start time really kicked my butt for the rest of the day, even after a nap.

I'm starting to show on the outside... my pants don't fit, but I use a belly band to keep them up. I'm not big enough for maternity pants, but had I not lost 9 pounds, I might have been by this point. I had to pack up 80% of my shirts last week - not that I couldn't fit into them anymore, but that they just looked nasty, clinging in all the wrong places. I've still got my loosy-goosy shirts that I can wear and I got some more for Christmas. I wore my first maternity t-shirt yesterday which was honestly a little bit of a bummer for me. It looked way bigger on the hanger than it actually ended up looking once it was on me. I've got preggo friends who are pressuring me to make the move to the oh-so-attractive maternity pants because of the huge comfort factor, but for some reason I'm fighting that transition. I just don't feel big enough for them yet (even though my current pants are pretty uncomfortable).

One thing I'm glad that's changed has been my level of excitement. While I was sick, I really was not very joyful about the baby, or anything for that matter. I had been struggling with heavy guilt about that; after all, I should be glowing, elated, thrilled... overflowing with joy! I wasn't feeling that way - the way a pregnant woman is "supposed" to feel - did that mean I wasn't grateful? Was I not being appreciative for the huge blessing that was given to us? Did I have a selfish attitude? Was I pitying myself for not feeling well? Oh gosh, what a relief it's been to be excited! All of those old feelings are totally gone, and I'm a busy little bee doing all kinds of research and online "window" shopping. We've picked which room would be the baby's, nursery themes for both a boy or a girl, the furniture we like, and so on. I even made my first couple of baby purchases, which were some used cloth diapers from my friend Jen (we'll be a cloth diapering family) and a crib! My whole attitude has done a complete 180 from the past six weeks and I'm finally bubbly and excited to get into everything baby (except toys.... I'm NOT looking forward to toys). I just can't wait to start buying some things and moving it into the room!

On a final note, I just got back from the doctor's office for my 12-week appointment. Another ultrasound isn't scheduled until 20 weeks, but we did get to hear the baby's heartbeat for the first time (heart rate was 158, which I'm told is good). Even more exciting to me than the heartbeat was that we got to hear the baby moving a whole bunch. Doc F wasn't concerned about my weight loss to this point, but he did say that I needed to start packing in the calories wherever I could, by drinking a lot of milk or diet supplement cans like Boost (yuck). Other than that, he was pleased with my progress and said everything looked great!


ritapolk said...

whoo hoo! So glad you're feeling better!!

If a baby pool existed where people guessed the sex, I would guess boy for you. (You should have Will make his own prediction. He's surprisingly accurate.)

Jess said...

hahaha, yeah he does brag about how "right" he always is about that.

He did already make his prediction way back in August, though, for a girl, haha. :)

Christy said...

That boost stuff is gross, the only one that isn't too bad is chocolate flavor carnation instant breakfast. I remember having to find a drink like that stuff when I had surgery in high school to get my weight up. I tried boost, slim fast shakes, and something else, and carnation was the only one that just tasted like chocolate milk and not gross.